I have avoided posting recently because I didn't want to seem overly negative. This has been the roughest finals week I have ever known. Whether finals, projects, or assessments, there were at least two due every day through today. Four Monday, two Tuesday, two Wednesday, one tomorrow, and one Friday. If I weren't only a year from finishing classes, this is the week I would have been more than tempted to drop my major...or drop school completely. I have never felt so disgusted with myself. Lately, I feel like nothing quite measures up anymore. I used to be such a dedicated student, but more often than not this semester, I find myself scrounging just to get by. At least there is one bright spot. As of today, I will never have to take sightsinging or dictation again. As of Friday, I will never have to take theory again. I cannot even begin to explain the feeling of freedom. It's just coasting from here, and I can feel excited about learning again. It's not that my GPA has plummeted. It's not that I'm doing terribly in all of my classes. It's just the horrible realization that you now loathe something you once loved. I was trying to avoid begin negative, so perhaps I should move on.
On a happier note, nothing is happier than the approach of Christmas. This is the first year that I have been truly excited about Christmas in a very long time. I love seeing Christmas lights and holiday decorations. The stores are piled high with festive boxes and merchandise, and I keep searching for the right gifts. Everything seems so bright and happy. "O Come All Ye Faithful" drifts through the cold night air. Candles flicker, adding cheerful warmth, but also a degree of solemnity. Snow flurries fall outside of busy houses. Inside, cookies are baking in the oven, and families are decorating the tree. Children whisper excitedly over shiny boxes, while couples embrace under the mistletoe. Others sit happily by the fire, sipping peppermint mochas and watching "It's a Wonderful Life" for the millionth time.
Mmm...peppermint mochas...
2 comments:
Hey! I hope we can hang out more next semester. :) I'm so glad to be a SAI sister with you! I hope your holidays are awesome :)
good luck with the rest of your week.
in the future, when I quiz for artist names, you don't count
hehe, just kiddin! and fyi, we have a date for one of those peppermint mochas :-D and good luck with finals, deary... that light at the end of the tunnel is not an oncoming train... love you!
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