"In my eyes, you do no wrong"

A year ago today was the first day back from an incredibly draining trip to Disney World. I still haven't finished the book I started reading on the trip (it's a thick biography of George Harrison that I still read on and off), and I have never again worn the too-expensive shoes that rubbed horrible blisters on my feet (I only bought them the day before). Mostly, I remember it as a physically draining, sun screen smearing, hot day/frigid night, chaotic mess. But there are those seemingly insignificant moments that I will remember for the rest of my life. I didn't think it was so spectacular at the time, but a part of me would give quite a lot to go back to the way things were...just for a little while.

I'm finding that I have become increasingly memory-oriented. I suppose it has always been that way, but more and more, sights, sounds, and scents are triggering things that take me back to specific times and feelings. Certain birds chirping make me feel six years old, standing in the long black driveway of Nanny and Daddy-Al's. Many moments take me back to that place, and I'm never sure why. A warm breeze blowing across my face will trigger moments with friends and family...different places, different times, but all having one thing in common: happiness. I feel like I'm grasping vainly at broken fragments of my life. Everything seems such a mess, but yet when I'm walking down the street on a perfect, sunny day, I can only think of these happy memories. It doesn't matter what is going on...the moment I step into the sunshine, everything seems to slip away. I'm thankful for this retreat, but at the same time, I feel that it is only a false sense that aids my "I'll worry about it tomorrow" mentality. Oh well. Lovely day.

I went to Marshall's recital tonight (which was awesome) and then to "Hendley Orchestra" rehearsal. It was a good night for the GC&SU music world. Rehearsal ran late, so I'm still pretty wired. There are so many things running through my head...things I want to do...things I need to do. Laundry is piling higher and higher, but I lack the motivation, quarters (forgot to replenish my stash over break), and detergent to actually take action. Hehe. There are minutes to type, music to practice, auditions to prepare for, and papers to write. But all I really want to do is to curl up under the warm glow of my lamp, watch Golden Girls (or something equally jovial), and read either "Fellowship of the Ring", "Wit", or "George Harrison" (inspired by the first paragraph I typed). I love lazy Thursdays; they signal the beginning of a deceptively idle weekend (deceptive because it fools me into thinking that I have a reprieve from obligations - hehe). ::strech:: Maybe I'll just fall asleep instead.